The difficulty of 'I Want'

Have you ever found it difficult to say the words 'I want'? Perhaps at a barber shop, perhaps at a restaurant, perhaps in front of your parents? Have you ever wondered why? Where does your courage go? 

Do you want to go to college? Do you want a new car? Do you want to get married to a certain someone? Do you want a different order? Do you want a different haircut? Do you want another person in bed or to share your coffee? 

If you've ever found yourself hesitating to say what you want, you've probably also doubted what you want or perhaps asked yourself 'why do I want it?' Perhaps this arises out of an inculcated idea of selfishness and it being bad. A guilt that's associated with 'I want'.

"Look at him he wants another toy."

"Did you know she wanted all my time, like every minute?"

"He wanted to experiment - sexually"

"She wanted to go out, again!"

Follow this up with a simple "can't (s)he be happy with what (s)he has?" And you have the real problem. Satisfaction isn't an easy thing and wanting (more than what you get) is opposed to it for some reason. 

Ive often found myself wondering (as have all souls eventually) settling versus going for what you want - what is better? And everyone has eventually figured out 'to want is to get or perish'.

People often find it a social obligation not to want something. If you can get over what others think and figure out what you want you'd be a happier person, famous even perhaps. Not in the sense of justification, but Hitler went after what he wanted despite what others thought and he seemed pretty happy till he died, and there's no one as famous as him; Gandhi went after what he wanted and he is famous and respected as well as followed.

No, this doesn't mean 'fame' is a reason of going after what you want, it's self happiness, and the irritation that an unfulfilled desire brings to you can only be undone by a fulfilled want. What I'm trying to say is, it's okay to want something - whether it's a specific table at a restaurant or the eradication of some personally affecting discrimination. If it makes your life better (and hopefully the lives of others as well) you should want it and you must go after it.

P.S. Some of the examples are extremely stereotypical only for reader understanding, I don't uphold or pursue such stereotypes.